It's In His Kiss
by Sting4052
Summary: Have you ever done something so completely spontaneous and delicious that you just couldn't resist? Well, Sharon has and it's her little secret to share with a good friend. She and Andy are together and very happy, but she's still very human and not perfect. Okay, in my mind she's always perfect, but ya know what I mean. Read about her perfectly imperfect little encounter.


Opening another bottle of wine is proving a little more difficult than Sharon anticipated. She's focused on removing the cork from the bottle, but she's also sensing someone behind her in the kitchen.

"Do you need a little help?" asks Fritz Howard.

Before Sharon can answer, she feels him at her side pulling the bottle from her hand. His proximity startles her a bit, but she gives him a friendly smile and says, "I thought you didn't drink."

"I don't drink alcohol, but I can open a bottle of wine for you," he replies.

She scoots over, to give him a little room, and hands him the corkscrew. Taking it from her, his hand lingers on hers longer than would seem necessary. He's looking at her intently with a half-smile on his face. She is noticing several things at once: his eyes look sad, he needs a shave and he smells wonderful. Time seems to drag a little as their hands and eyes connect. It's an intimate, little moment that leaves her slightly puzzled as she slowly slides her hand and eyes away from his. Taking a small step back from him she's already questioning what just happened in her mind.

"You know it's really kind of funny," remarks Fritz as he tugs the cork out of the bottle of white wine.

"What's funny?" she asks.

"My relationship is falling apart and yours has just started," he says with a hint of bitterness in his voice.

She reaches out to touch his bare forearm and says, "I'm sorry. I heard the rumor, but I was hoping it wasn't true."

"Oh, it's very true," he says. "It has been brewing for a long time. We've decided to give it a rest for a few months. We're not totally calling it quits yet, but I don't know ... I'm just really tired of always having to compromise."

"I know a thing or two about compromise," Sharon says. "Most of my marriage was nothing but compromise on my part. I'm certainly in no position to offer advice, but the two of you deserve every happiness," she tells him before taking the bottle of wine from him and pouring herself a generous portion.

He watches her pour and then take a long swallow. He can't seem to stop staring at her mouth. She has a small amount of liquid on her lips, and it's all he can do not to reach out with his finger to touch the wetness. He wonders how she would react if he were to do such an uncharacteristic thing. She's a decade older than him, but he has always appreciated her beauty and grace. The way she conducts herself is above reproach and he admires that about her. Staring at her wet lips, he doesn't immediately respond when she asks for his help. "Oh, of course let me carry that," he says while reaching for a large platter of hors d'oeuvres she's struggling to lift from the counter.

Following her out to the balcony of her condo he can't help but admire the view of her form-fitting sundress from behind. The dress hits just above her knees and has spaghetti straps. The left strap has slipped off her shoulder, but she hasn't noticed. She instructs him to set the platter down on the patio table, and people immediately gather around the food.

Sharon and Andy have invited family, friends and co-workers over for a casual cocktail party. The evening air is warm and a little muggy. Her hair is up, but a few tendrils are loose and sticking to her neck. Fritz is still watching her when he sees Andy out of the corner of his eye. As if no one else is around, Sharon locks eyes with Andy and they both smile at each other. Andy walks up to Sharon, and slowly brushes one finger up her left arm to put her strap back in place. It's such an intimate gesture that Fritz feels he should look away, but he doesn't. Andy traces her exposed collarbone with his finger, and gently touches the loose curls at the nape of her neck. Observing this, Fritz is almost overcome with a wave of nostalgia for his former life with Brenda Leigh. He misses the unexpected little touches they'd share; the meaningful eye contact that could easily take the place of words; the inside jokes that no one but them would understand. He can feel himself sinking deeper into his memories as he openly stares at Sharon and Andy. He doesn't even realize that Provenza is trying to talk to him. With no small amount of effort, he drags himself back to the here and now so he can talk baseball with Provenza.

Sharon is enjoying herself. It's rare for her to allow herself to be completely at ease around her colleagues, but they aren't at work and she has had just enough wine to make her loosen up a bit; although, the encounter she just had with Fritz in her kitchen has left her a little distracted. He looked so sad, and she had to stifle a strong urge to hug him. She knew instinctively that would be the wrong thing to do. She enjoys working with him, and feels he's a bit of a kindred spirit. If she's being totally honest she can even admit to harboring a fantasy or two about him in the middle of the night. Of course, that was in the past. She is with Andy now, but still she thinks Fritz Howard is very easy on the eyes.

He's wearing jeans and a dark v-neck t-shirt. Sharon noticed a leather strap wrapped multiple times around his right wrist when they were standing in the kitchen. She was going to ask him about it, but they were standing so close she could feel the hair on his arm tickling her skin and that distracted her from asking. Andy is talking to her, but she's only half listening because she's focused on the leather encircling Fritz's wrist. Each time he moves his arm she can see the taught muscles flex under his skin. The leather strap sways as he reaches for a plate and some food. She should stop staring. She knows this, but she can't help herself.

Fritz is laughing at something Provenza is telling him. He has a beautiful smile, but Sharon notices that it doesn't quite reach his eyes like his smiles usually do. She understands the situation. How many times has she had to pretend? It's so hard to act happy when deep, deep down you are not happy. It's almost painful to pretend, and her heart goes out to him. Sharon understands loving a person who is simply incapable of returning your love in the way you deserve. Thankfully, that's no longer a problem for her. What she has with Andy is such an unexpected gift, and it makes her feel fragile and vulnerable. Andy is so attentive and caring with her, and those are attributes she's not entirely sure how to handle. She is still trying to get comfortable with all her feelings for Andy.

"I wish I wasn't the designated driver tonight," Andy says to Sharon. "Nicole and Dean rode here with me, and I'll have to give them a ride home when the party is over." He's nuzzling his nose next to her and softly speaking in her ear. "I'll hurry back so I can help you clean up or we could just leave the mess and head straight to bed."

Sharon leans into Andy and briefly closes her eyes while listening to him murmur in her ear. Fritz is watching the interaction between the two. He can see Sharon nod yes and smile seductively at Andy. She doesn't say a word, but she places her right hand on his chest. Andy reaches up, grasps her hand and places a kiss on her palm. Fritz wonders what the contact feels like. He also wonders if she's doing that humming thing he has heard her do when words aren't necessary. These are not appropriate thoughts he realizes, but again he can't seem to stop.

Fritz decides to take his plate and move away from the couple to the other side of the balcony. He's not sure why he accepted Sharon's invitation to this gathering. He isn't really in the mood to be sociable, and he knows people are wondering about Brenda Leigh. He had no intention of talking about her this evening, and he's not sure what made him blurt out the relationship comment to Sharon in the kitchen. It's just that he has always found Sharon to be an easy person to talk to. She listens; really listens and doesn't just pretend to listen. She will give her honest, unfiltered opinion when asked, and for the most part he generally always agrees with her. He would never admit any of that to Brenda Leigh. Of course, they aren't really talking or spending any time together these days and that makes him sad but also a little relieved. The tension between them right now is just too much.

From his seat on the balcony, he can see Sharon's bedroom through the French doors. There's a lamp casting a soft glow on the nightstand. The bed is made, but it looks mussed and the pillows are in disarray. A picture of her on the bed wearing only a bra and panties pops into his head. _Now where the hell did that come from_? He wonders to himself. Of course, the very person he's fantasizing about at this moment is approaching him with a glass of tea in one hand and a glass of wine in the other.

"I thought you might want something to drink," she says as she hands him the glass of tea, and takes a seat next to him. She's studying his face intently. "Are you doing okay?"

"Oh, I have good days and bad days," he answers. "Today is a pretty good day."

"Good, like I said earlier you deserve to be happy," she says.

"Well, you look very happy," he tells her.

She can't maintain eye contact and her cheeks are turning pink as she takes a sip of wine. "I am happy," she says as she looks at the people on her balcony. Just a few short years ago, it would've been hard to imagine this night. That was back when she was living a mostly solitary and mostly unfulfilling life with her children grown and gone and her marriage mostly over; now she has Andy and Rusty, and she leads a team of elite detectives who are all very good at their jobs. "Life is good," she tells Fritz, "just be patient and your life will be good again."

"It's funny that you should use the word patient," he says. Lifting his wrist, he shows her the sterling silver symbol embedded into the leather around his wrist. "This is the Chinese symbol for patience. Actually, it means more than just patience. It also stands for tolerance, restraint and control. My AA sponsor gave it to me when I first got sober over 14 years ago. It's a reminder to take things one day at a time."

Sharon is lost in thought as she listens to Fritz while tracing the outline of the design with her finger. She's remembering how patient she was with Jack for so many years, and how patient she was with the very people occupying her home right now. Some of them had treated her badly or at least with great indifference, but with a huge amount of patience, tolerance, restraint and control she has managed to turn things around with Rusty, her team and most significantly Andy.

"It's beautiful," she says with a trace of melancholy in her voice

"Hey, are you okay?" Fritz asks her. He's staring at her hand resting on his arm.

"Yes, I was just thinking that patience really is a virtue," she tells him as she releases her hand. This moment between them feels just as intimate as the moment they had earlier in her kitchen. She doesn't have time to dwell on it though because Andy approaches to tell her he's leaving to drive Nicole and Dean home. Grateful for the distraction, Sharon abruptly excuses herself from the emotionally charged moment to join Andy. Her quick exit leaves Fritz feeling like he can breathe again. He wasn't even aware he'd almost been holding his breath when they touched. He should call it a night, but he doesn't feel like he even has the energy to stand at this moment.

On the other side of the balcony, Sharon is saying goodbye to Andy's daughter and son-in-law. They've had a very good time and are feeling no pain after several glasses of wine. "I'll be back soon," Andy says to Sharon before giving her a chaste goodbye kiss on the cheek and heading out the door.

Rusty is the next to leave. He's living in a dorm room on campus and loves it, but he misses seeing Sharon every day. Provenza punches him in the shoulder and tells him not to be a stranger.

"Please drive safely, text me when you get in," Sharon says to Rusty as she wraps him in a hug.

In the next 20 minutes all but one person has left her home. She slips her shoes off her aching feet after showing Amy and Cooper to the door. Stepping back out onto the balcony she sees Fritz gathering plates and glasses.

"You don't have to do that," she says. "Andy will help me when he gets back."

"It's no trouble," he assures her, "I really enjoyed myself, and it was nice getting out of the house for a change."

She takes some of the dishes from his hands, and he follows her into the kitchen. They both stand at the sink as she runs hot water. He notices the strap of her dress has once again fallen off her shoulder. Without even thinking about it, he reaches out and pushes the thin material back up her arm. His feather-light touch makes her shiver slightly, and she turns to look up at him. He's surprised how petite she is in bare feet. Their eyes meet and he impulsively leans into her, pushing her back against the sink, his hands resting on either side of her on the counter. He just stares at her. This isn't planned. This isn't thought out. This is reckless, but it feels so right to him. His lips crush hers and his body overwhelms her.

It happens so quickly she doesn't even immediately comprehend that her tongue is in his mouth and she's whimpering for more. His arms move to wrap around her waist. She slides her hands up his chest and around his neck. Her breasts are pushed against him, and he's pulling her even tighter to him. He moves one hand up into her hair. His other hand skims over the curve of her hip. They aren't thinking at the moment; they are experiencing the physical attraction of their bodies reacting to each other, and the sensations washing over both of them are stimulating and intense.

Sharon finally registers what she is allowing to happen in the heat of this moment. She breaks the kiss; he steps back slightly; Sharon reaches for the sink to shut the water off as an excuse to turn away from him. She doesn't turn back around. She just stares into the sink breathing heavily. They both speak at the same time. "I'm sorry," he says. "I can't," she says.

There are really no more words to be spoken. This isn't going to happen, but the fact that it could've happened hangs heavy in the air between them. Fritz reaches out to touch her, but stops before he makes contact. He shouldn't touch her; he shouldn't have kissed her; he urgently feels the need to explain himself, but the words aren't there. How can he explain his loneliness? How can he explain his sadness? How can he explain his need to connect with a woman he's only ever dealt with professionally? How can he explain something he doesn't even understand himself? There are no words. Walking away from her, he lets himself out the front door. He steps onto the elevator as Andy exits. Both men say goodnight, but Fritz can't possibly look Andy in the eyes, and Andy doesn't even really notice because he's eager to get back to Sharon.

She easily slips back into the Sharon that Andy knows and loves when she hears him enter the condo. It's not hard to mask the many conflicting thoughts and emotions going on in her head and heart. It's not hard because she has been doing it for decades on the job with her co-workers; with criminals; with victims; with Jack. Her ability to remain calm and collected has always served her well. She can't stand the thought of hurting Andy. Her encounter with Fritz was just that: an encounter, a moment in time, shared with a kindred spirit in a time of need. She will not allow a moment to destroy what she and Andy have patiently built together.

Andy looks at her standing barefoot in the kitchen with flushed cheeks and her hair tumbling down. Crossing the living room quickly, he gathers her in his arms. His heart is full. He's happy, and he just needs to touch her. "I missed you," he says.

It fleetingly crosses her mind to worry that he will know. He'll know that she just passionately kissed another man. How will she explain her actions? There's no need for an explanation because he gently lowers his head and kisses her softly. It's the exact opposite of the kiss she shared with Fritz and it's perfect. It's with love and desire, not desperation and need. It's the sweet kind of kiss that feels like a lazy Sunday morning in bed; like a peaceful walk on the beach at dusk; like a promise of forever. The kind of kiss that feels like home.

Three days later, Sharon enters her office after having lunch with Andy. She has successfully avoided running into Fritz, but she has thought a lot about what happened and why. She had too much wine, but it wasn't just the wine that allowed her to respond to Fritz Howard. She is human despite what some people may have thought about her in the past. She had a human response to a very attractive, younger man who was and still is a friend, but she knows exactly who her heart belongs to and she'll never doubt it again.

Out of the corner of her eye she spots a small box sitting on top of an envelope on her desk. She sits and picks up the box first. Opening it carefully she is surprised to see a delicate silver chain with a pendant matching the shape of the one on Fritz's wrist. The Chinese symbol for patience. It makes her smile. Opening the envelope, she pulls out a cream-colored note card that reads:

Dear Sharon,

Thank you for your patience with me. I shouldn't have put you in such an awkward position. I can promise you it will not happen again. You are a friend and an excellent colleague, and I want to tell you that your tolerance of me and your restraint and control was very much appreciated. You are a beautiful person, and you deserve all the happiness in the world with Andy. I'm patiently looking for my happiness. I know I'll find it again, and I plan to keep looking one day at a time.

Sincerely,

Fritz

The End

Thanks so much to the most awesome RockinRobinB for inspiring me to write this little fantasy, and for putting her special touch on it to make it so much better. As per usual, none of the characters belong to me. Major Crimes does not belong to me (except in my mind) and I'm just borrowing the awesomeness for my own enjoyment.


End file.
